Ugh, stupid fucking cop car/ambulance/fire engine (I can never tell the difference... although knowing this neighbourhood, it was a cop car...) decided to turn on its siren super extra loud just right outside of my building, then turn it off again. Just enough to wake me up and confuse me so that I'm all fumbling with my alarm clark. At least when the siren starts from further away and gradually gets louder as it gets closer it doesn't disturb my sleep nearly as much. But there's nothing like waking up in a panic like that to make me unable to go back to sleep right away.

I've decided to try and ween myself off of the energy drinks, simply because I'm trying to cut down my expenses while I'm living alone, but man... yesterday morning at work was not pretty. A bottle of Diet Pepsi just does not have the same kick. I was pretty useless. Luckily last night I caved and bought an energy drink for today. Tomorrow I'll try the Diet Pepsi route again and hope for better. But I know this will be a difficult process.

Cute Emo Boy continues to perplex and frustrate me. I have no idea what he's thinking... it's probably nothing good, though, because I'm often acting like a retard when I'm with him... which has for some reason become my natural response to nervousness. So yesterday at lunch I was being goofy and trying to give him random stuff as presents, like the salt shaker and a piece of string that was on the table and he was just like "You know, your gifts would mean a lot more if they weren't just random crap you found in your direct line of vision." Which still makes me laugh, just the way he said it. I was just like "You reject my salt shaker... do you also reject my love?" And he said no. And instead of me just leaving it at that rather satisfying answer, I had to continue to be retarded and was like "But the salt shaker and my love are one and the same." So he was like "Well in that case, I do reject it then."

Meh, I dunno. I wish he was easier to talk to. He was really open for a while, but he definitely did close up again. I'm so drawn to him, though, because I can see a lot of myself in him. And sometimes, the way he looks at me... my heart melts and I die.

I hope to fucking hell that I'm not asked to supervise again tomorrow and Friday. Me and the other backup supervisor need to get on this alternating schedule that was originally proposed. I think I've had enough practice and have learned all that I can really learn at this point in time. Plus I'm just tired of feeling like a tool two days of every week. Feeling like a tool two days of every other week I could handle a lot better.

Anyways... life giving energy drink or not, I should try to get more sleep.