Friday night... Capital City Guy, the Cute Awkward Guy, and myself went out to watch the hockey game and then to see some strippers. Capital City Guy and I got way more wasted than we had planned on and got into a fight... that kinda got physical. Now... we don't know who hit who first. I really don't want to believe he hit me first. I mean, we have play-slapped eachother for fun or during certain "activities" *ahem* but this was different because we were drunk and actually angry at eachother. If I hit him first then I think he was justified in hitting me back but... well, I dunno. I don't want to think about it too much, and if this was just an isolated incident then we can move on. No physical damage was done and all that. Anyways, we stopped at McDonalds after the bar and after Capital City Guy got his food he just charged out of there without saying anything to either of us. So the Cute Awkward Guy walked me home.

Anyways, eventually Capital City Guy called me and I don't really remember what was said, but I was crying and wailing and no doubt Roomie heard me carrying on. I just remember Capital City Guy trying to calm me down, asking me to come over so we could talk about it. He also told me what his buzzer number was, like 15 times. Like I don't already know. So anyways, I don't remember walking over there but apparently I did, just next thing I remember I was there and still bawling and he was holding me and we were apologising to eachother... then we passed out.

Saturday night was also interesting. I decided to try and patch things up with Giggles, since it was her birthday yesterday and we were originally planning to go ou to UFC together to celebrate. ANYWAYS... Giggles shows up at the bar with her latest boyfriend just COMPLETELY wasted. And it seemed like she was more than just drunk. She was unbelieveably obnoxious, screaming at everything, and when her boyfriend left to go meet up with his pot dealer she kept asking me every two minutes where he was. It was a little concerning. Then she went to go to the bathroom or something and decided that this guy was in her way soooooo... she slapped him. And, needless to say, got kicked out of the bar. And she hasn't talked to me at all since then, I don't know if she thinks it was my fault somehow that she got kicked out or is mad at me for not chasing after her when she stormed out of there... I dunno. I just don't know.

And then last night. At Capital City Guy's place. We basically spent the whole day together, I offered to cook us dinner... now he really wants to move, I really want to move, so I decided to bring up a topic again that I had originally brought up awhile ago... us living together. And, like, the discussion actually started off well. He said he had been thinking a lot about that possibility too. He said how it's practically like we're living together already since I spend a lot of my time over there. He said he knows I'm dependable, would keep things clean, we'd give eachother space... talked about how we'd get some of my furniture down here from my parents' place, possibly buying some new stuff... but then oh, oh no. We can't live together FOR THE SAME GODDAMN REASON HE GAVE ME BEFORE... we are not financial equals. I don't make enough money for us to be able to compile enough money together to make a downpayment on a place. And I'm all "WHOA WHOA WHOA, back this truck up" because we were just talking about RENTING a place, not BUYING one. And he was all like "Yeah, but I'd like to be able to buy a place in about a year or so." He's thinking considerably more long term than me. And I'm all like "SO MUCH can happen in a year!" We might not even be together in a year. He might lose his job and have to take a pay cut in his next one. I might get an amazing job that pays twice what his does now. Keep a fuckin' open mind, and take one goddamn step at a time!

So, yeah, that discussion didn't go well. So today I'm all thinking... if the amount of money I make is apparently the one thing holding him back from wanting to make a real commitment and live together... then that's fucking petty and I'm not sure if I want to continue this. Like... he knows I'm thrifty and good with saving money and making the most of what I have, and admits I could probably teach him a thing or two... but I make half as much money as he does and that's just a deal breaker, apparently. Even though I reminded him that when I met him a year and a half ago he was making the same amount per hour as I am now. GAH it just pisses me off. I need some time.