I've been under a lot of stress lately, you dig? Emu fears change... but yet Emu has brought a helluva lot of change onto herself lately, and she's not handling it well.
So I ended up having a very interesting conversation on MSN this evening with Squinty and his roommate. Oh my god. How much do I just not want to get myself involved with them? It was so nice when she was off wherever the hell it was that she was off to, and he came over here pretty much every weekend and I went over there that one time and... oh, just niceness all around. But now that she's back... they're a package-fucking-deal, man. Can't have one without the other. Anyways, they want me to come over to the Big City the next time I have a couple days off and... yeah.
All I can say is they better supply the booze and a hell of a lot of it if I were to do such a thing.
I never did go for a bike ride today... but the level of despair I was feeling did propel me to go for one hell of a long walk. Well... exercise is exercise. I didn't really go to anywhere in particular... well, I did end up buying the second Harry Potter book, since I'm almost done the first one now. Lord help me, this is one thing that I really thought I'd never get into. And... yep.
I feel sick. My appetite is very strange lately. I had a couple of danishes for brunch (since I didn't even drag my ass out of bed until 10:00) and then a couple more for supper and... yeah. That's been my food consumption for today. And right now, the way I feel... I can't imagine eating another thing ever. So... my death will be soon.
Actually, no, despite my huge crying spree earlier today, I still distinctly feel like I could launch into another one at any second now.
Know what I'm still digging, though? Know what never fails to put a smile on my face? The fact that I no longer work at that mall. I no longer work in retail. I now work downtown in an office building. I feel like a fucking grown up. Finally.
Now I just have to get over the fact that my new job absolutely scares the shit out of me. I mean, sure, I've only worked one day there so far... of course it's been scary. And of course it'll get less scary. But right now... oh, the fear. The fear the fear the fear.