*ahem* Anyhoo... yeah, I went out tonight. Yeah, I met up with that guy from last week. And, um... yeah, I might have had sex with this other guy... but remember what I said about not liking to be judged. Emu has been repressed for a long time and she's fucking fed up with life, so she's just out to have some fun. Although, I'm thinking that I might fall back on Thing 2's philosophy that if you can't feel it, it didn't actually happen. In a way, I think that's quite brilliant. And, literally, this guy lasted about 30 seconds, if that. And it didn't really feel like anything. And I'm quite far from the whole hot dog vs hallway thing, so... yeah.

Thing 1 this evening, first thing she said when she saw me... "If it makes you feel any better, [Thing 2] regrets going to [Bam]'s place last night. She didn't have a very good time." And, yeah, that actually did make me feel better. A little.

But, yeah, good times tonight. Met up with that guy from last weekend... I don't know why, but he was doing horse tranquilizers and it's just... no, man. Not necessary. Horse tranquilizers are for fucking horses, man. But he bought me a couple drinks, so whatever. Then I hooked up with that other guy and kind of ended up getting it on in an alley way for, like I said, about 30 seconds... well, whatever. I got that guy's phone number and he got mine. Then I got together with this third guy, the friend of the guy Thing 1 was hanging out with... aw man. Okay, he's now my friend on Facebook but... this guy was wasted if I've never seen a guy wasted before. And after we got back to Thing 1's place, we were laughing so hard... he decided to just get completely naked after we got back to his friend's place and both Thing 1 and I, no matter how cruel this may be, were just like "That is, by far, the smallest penis I have ever seen." Seriously, I was thisclose to saying "Um... where's the rest?" Ha. And, like, at one point he was like "I bet you could take this whole thing in your mouth" and I was like "Um... yeah. I imagine I could."

Thing 1 and I laughed SO MUCH. So cruel, though. I realize this.

And, like I said... do not judge Emu. Emu does not like to be judged. Emu set out to have a good time tonight, and she did. Now I really need to go to bed because I work this morning and I'd really prefer not to die at work. I did sleep a lot today, that's pretty much all I did, but I do think I still need a bit more sleep before I go to work.