I left work early because I couldn't handle it anymore. Like... I can't even begin to explain it. Nothing catastrophic happened or anything like that, but... I knew I had to leave. Plus I was feeling kinda woozy, so at least I didn't have to fake sick to get out of there, because I sorta already was.

It's like... they gave me power and authority and control, then they fucking took it away again. I can't handle that. Don't give me something then take it away as soon as I'm used to it. It makes me sad and angry. It makes me want to quit my job tomorrow.

Tonight me thinks I may polish up thy resume. Hit up all the job search websites. Keep my eye glued to the classifieds. I need out of there, man.

Anyways, in Bam news... he continues to not impress me all over the place. He's wanting a damn threesome already. Uh... yeah. Sure, let's get right on that. Actually, our MSN conversation from last night was pretty priceless... And this is so great, he asked me if I had had a threesome before and I said "No... and the only way I would, would be if it was with 2 guys, so unless that's what you want..." and he actually said "id rather 2 girls, but the other could be arranged" Oh. My. God. Seriously... I would sell my soul to be a part of that. Lifelong dream. But... yeah. If he's serious about that, I'd seriously seriously consider it. I'd maybe even do the two girls one guy threesome in exchange for the two guys one girl threesome if need be.

Like, you know... I like girls, I just have jealousy issues. I just don't think I could handle a threesome with another girl without feeling inferior in every way, and the second I thought she was better than me or getting more attention than me I'd be so so crushed and damaged for life. But that's just me. And yes, I've thought about this.

ANYWAYS... haaaa, I'm supposed to still be at work. Stupid work. DAMN STUPID WORK MAKING ME FEEL LIKE I NEED TO LEAVE EARLY TO SAVE WHAT LITTLE SANITY I HAVE. Now my next paycheque is going to be smaller. Shitty.

Oh, and getting back to Bam here... I also went to see him before I started work, and he went off on this rather offensive anti-Christian rant... not cool, man. I mean, he doesn't know me that well... how does he know I'm not a full blown Christian? Well, I mean... I'm obviously not a very good Christian, but I could still be one. Bad-mouthing any religion infront of me is pretty much not a wise thing to do. Not appreciated by the Emu.

I'm breaking out pretty badly again. Ugh. Oh, and hey, that eyeliner I bought yesterday? It's quite smashing. And yes, I said "smashing". Me like.