But, hey, I am willing to talk about it now. Because I'm sure you all care. It's just the Little Chickita's teenaged-ness rubbing off on me, I think. Bringing back a very sad little person who was trapped inside me who I had really hoped was dead.
Anyways... yesterday I got a text message from the Little Chickita saying "[RSGM] is 24!" Yeah, for some reason she figured that warranted its own text message. When I was talking to her later on MSN and I asked her what the hell that was about, she told me how she had a chance to talk to him at work, and she ended up asking him how old he was, among other things.
Okay, a few weeks ago we were being girlish and talking about the men at work, and I mentioned RSGM as being, hands down, the nicest looking guy there and she was all like "What? Eww! He's all short and blonde and shy and stuff. Not cool." I figured that was fine. I don't need her approval. However... she's seen the light now. She now understands.
And this is where it starts sounding very immature and high school-like. She's trying to get him interested in her now. And, well, I'd be lying if I said I haven't been trying to do the same. So my initial reaction, because apparently I've morphed back into myself as I was at age 16, was to get really pissed off and upset about this. Competition, you know. And because of my total lack of self-esteem, plus the fact that I've already said a few things to him that haven't really lead anywhere... if she goes after him and succeeds, I was quite convinced last night/this morning that I would die several consecutive excrutiating deaths.
But don't judge me for that, because I'm totally over that feeling now. I'd be a little jealous, sure. But, I mean... nothing's happened yet, and there's still the very real possibility that nothing will. She's the one who considers saying hi to a guy a "dare" worth admiring, so I somehow doubt she's actually going to get anywhere. But, yeah, I was upset last night. And while I did jokingly say to her today that I was willing to fight her to the death for him... meh. I don't care. And I've decided that I should really wait until an opportunity for me to be upset comes up before I actually do become upset. I've become somewhat dramatic, though, and I'm convinced its the Little Chickita's influence. You should hear her go on about her love that never was. She's fucking psycho, and doesn't even realize it. However, I eventually did realize that I was being insane, and remedied the situation. Now I'm zen.
And I hate that I just felt the need to share this all with you. This might be another one of those entries that ends up getting deleted soon. Makes me sound so petty and childish. But keep in mind, like I said... I don't care anymore.