It's, Like, All Kinds Of Not Good

Wow. Today was a messed up day. Everything that could go wrong at work, did go wrong at work. I'm sooo out of it, I'm so tired, I'm so depressed... I was chatting with the male of the former loveless bickering couple online on my lunch break and made the mistake of saying I was lonely, now he's dragging me downtown for dinner. Sounds like a date. I can sense how displeased Capital City Guy will be later on. I'm not in the mood for this... you know how you can feel lonely but at the same time not really want anything to do with people? Yeah. I think what I actually need is a cat or something. But... I said I'd call the guy once I'm done laundry. Sigh. Well, at the very least... I will be hungry. So I guess this will accomplish something.

I dunno if Capital City Guy's stupid movie night is still going on tonight. Didn't wanna go anyway. I'm debating whether or not to tell him that one friend of his is a complete fucking asshole, of if I should just opt out of anything that he is going to be at for other reasons. Cuz I'm sure if I told Capital City Guy what I thought, he'd just be like "Oh... you're taking him too seriously. He's just kidding." No. No. I'm usually pretty good at letting people's insulting little comments just slide but there's something particularly nasty about his. I do not care for it.

Oh, I dunno I dunno. What else is there to say? I'm just so dead. So tired. All the time tired. Never not tired. Don't really do anything to make myself tired, though. Just tired. And, yeah, I'm doing laundry. Fabulous fiasco that is. I love how awkward and clumsy and stupid I am. Like, into the laundry room there's two locked doors... seems excessive, but they both unlock with the same key. They're about 2 feet from eachother. And, yeah, somewhere along that two feet I managed to switch keys and spent about 10 minutes trying to open the second door with the wrong key. Then when I finally realized what the problem was and remedied the situation... there was someone in the laundry room just staring at me. Obviously they had heard me. Obviously they wondered how someone so stupid could exist. I often wonder the same thing.

Fuck. I don't particuarly want to go anywhere or be with anybody tonight. Uggh.


2008-07-29 at 4:44 p.m.