Oh, and I'm totally going to inquire about getting prescribed the birth control pill... if I'm not pregnant already (she adds in a tiny little voice). OH! PARANOIA! I've been a little careless, so when my period starts to become a couple days late I flip the hell out. Oh, I'm sure it's fine. I'm sure I'm fine. It's just that EVERYONE has been talking about pregnancy lately... it puts ideas in my head.
Guy just texted me. "U called the other night". Wha? Then I remembered... it was Thing 1. As has become tradition with us, her phone dies when she's over here, I give her permission to use mine, and she calls the entire fucking town. Yeah, I was just checking my call history... she pretty much did call EVERYONE.
I'm trying to get in contact with Texty, because I feel HORRIBLE. He's not replying to my messages, though. I have a feeling he might have called me... like, he comes up as a blocked number and I had two calls today from a blocked number where the person hung up as soon as I answered. So... that might have been him. I dunno. Oh, the shit we put eachother through. It's ridiculous.
I never mentioned how Big Penis Man came over on Saturday night too. Like... okay, I didn't say this but he was over for a little while on Saturday afternoon... which is when I discovered said size of said organ. Like... maybe I've lead a sheltered life, but I seriously let out an audible gasp when he whipped it out. By the way, I have absolutely no respect for the fact that he came over just for the sole purpose of trying to get me to fuck him. But, you know... maybe I did, maybe I didn't, I'm not going to discuss that right now. HOWEVER, I was talking about said size of said organ with Thing 1 and she was all "Aw man, I wish I wasn't so drunk when I had sex with him! I don't remember at all!" So she called him over here. But then when he showed up here and saw Four Night Stand Guy, who pretty much looks like he could kick anyone's ass, he seriously just turned around and left again. It was hilarious.
By the way, me and Thing 1 have the most OBSCENE discussions about sex... it's insane. You would love to hear us.
Yeah, I've done nothing today except eat and sleep and sit at the computer. At least tomorrow I have to go out to the doctor, so maybe that will inspire me to get some other things done too. Or maybe I'll just come home and collapse right afterwards, even more exhausted than ever. We'll see.