Oh god. Not a good evening. Not a good fucking evening. I essentially lost 60 bucks, and not in the "Tee hee, I spent it all on alcohol" way that I did last night. No... I FUCKING LOST 60 BUCKS. I was at the bar and... I lost my wallet. Officially 70 times worse than when I lost my keys at the bar. I mean... I found my wallet again eventually, but... 40 bucks was gone. Then I ended up giving my last $20 to this crack addict who was being really nice to Angry Girl and me after the bar closed and we were just hanging around downtown feeling generally fucked over.
And you want to know what a fucking whore I've become? This guy, who I just met and I'm not even totally sure what his name was... he finger fucked me and I sucked his cock on the lawn of this church downtown. Yep. Emu is a classy dame. I'm just... I'm not impressed with myself right now. And Angry Girl was with his friend, except according to her they didn't do anything but lie there and cuddle. Then they just ditched us. Out of nowhere. Just poof, the both of them were gone. And... yeah.
But, yeah. This crack addict guy was just really nice and he gave Angry Girl and me a doughnut and he needed money for a cab and... really. I mean, after losing 40 bucks by being an idiot, I was like "What's another 20?" He gave me his health care card, though, and I guess he's gonna call me sometime or whatever and we'll meet up and he'll pay me back and I'll give him back his care card. I dunno. You're kind of screwed in this province without your care card if you want any kind of medical attention. So hopefully this will happen. And, yeah, I just love associating with crack addicts in this way. He seemed like a nice guy, though. But that guy who fucking hardcore made out with me in the bar and then finger fucked me outside of the church before disappearing into thin air seemed like a nice guy at first too.
And I called Bam early on in the evening and asked him to call me later to tell me where he ended up, since he said he was going out, but did he ever call me? Oh hell no.
I'm just a stupid whore. Seriously. I need to stop this. I need to stop getting shitfaced and insane.
I finally got home at 5:30 in the goddamn morning. And Angry Girl's boyfriend keeps calling me asking what happened and where she is... he ditched her rather early in the evening, she ended up going to her ex-boyfriend's place again... I'm not going to tell him that, though, because Angry Girl has sworn me to secrecy and she's just been such a good friend... she held me while I cried about losing that 40 bucks and being such a dumb whore and... she's just great. I'm not going to rat her out to her asshole boyfriend. He doesn't need to know.
Ugh. I feel horrible. And it's goddamn 6 AM now. I should go to bed. Think about what I've done. What a fucking whore I've become. I used to be such a nice girl. Such a sensible girl. I'm so mad at myself.